…the Envelope, please!

April 16, 2012 By 13 Comments

(shhh, she cleared her voice let’s settle back and read… the Winner is about to be announced!)

Dear fellow Wakefield “Doctriners” ^_^

I believe that this was the toughest and funniest contest I had to ever judge – although it was a first for me. I can tell you this, each and every one of your entries has diverted me exceedingly and each in different, yet completing ways. So before I come to the point, I’d like to congratulate YOU ALL for the quality of your writing and review (big word here…not so much the point).

THE CRITERIA were these:

Good – Fun to read – Clever – ‘How cool was that’… as a (secret) judge I assigned stars (5 max) for each criteria. Then, you got “doctrine points” for each comment & like/Google Share your entry collected because the reader is king/queen and has the last word in my world ^_^.

Roger: db(2)+ 1.5 ml He = db(2) – 1.5 ml Co2 (a dead balloon is a dead balloon)

You wrote a very interesting piece that first brought question marks all around my head (you were not the only one having this effect on me though ^_^)… this is a good thing by the way. As I read on, your tone made me think of the main character in a book that I had just finished and liked a lot (“The History of Love” by Nicole Krauss). So I read with a smile on my face all along… I have looked in my own mind to find the file of my own “particularly fond childhood memories” but I do not think it is placed behind my left ear… I could not say since I have not found it entirely yet – just bits and pieces that I wish were as rich as yours. In short, I smiled – even laughed a bit, agreed with you most of the times as I related and wondered about life – longer than my daily dose… I loved the journey you took me on.

Jennifer: What does “a dead balloon is a dead balloon” have to do with Personality Types? Nothing.

You got me laughing just with your title, which is quite unusual with me. What’s with the fear of clowns? I never understood it! I don’t particularly like them either since they never made me laugh… hmm… well, okay… maybe I do get your point here ^_^. Your entry was filled with the type of humor I am very fond of, so thank you for that and for your great choice of music video as an illustration. I loved that concert by the way!

DS#1: Through the looking glass where a dead balloon is (really just) a dead balloon somewhere over the edge…

I am such a fan of Lewis Carroll’s stories… I was ecstatic when I read your title and read expectantly your entry. I was not disappointed at all… no surprise here… that is brilliant writing, the kind that keeps you on the edge yet not over it. You created vivid images in my mind and your story had dogs in it which got me melting from the start. Thank you for the wonderful reading! I enjoyed every second of it.

Clark: while, ‘a dead balloon is a dead balloon’ the quality that gives life to the (non-dead) balloons is imperishable and therefore hold(s) out hope to all balloons’

Alright Clark… maybe you’ve got the award of the longest title in the history of writing contests ^_^. Your entry puzzled me in a very good way… which means that your intent of being both amusing and wry is reached, no question. Is information really the reality of Clarks? Yes… maybe, depending on how you define information… could philosophy be a type of information? I’d say that in my book at least it could be. I have to admit that I loved this sentence: “A ‘dead balloon’ is to a ‘live balloon’ as clarks are to scotts and rogers”… made me laugh for one and then think… “the space within and between permits life to exist”… interesting train of thought.

Molly: When a Dead Balloon is not just a Dead Balloon

Do you know how I react when I feel something bad or embarrassing is about to happen in a story? I fast forward to make sure that I am heading towards a good ending, and then I go back to the bit I could not read… your modern fairytale had such an impact on me, which is an extremely good thing. The quality of your writing and your storytelling blew my mind Molly. Beyond that, what you said was quite the message too…

The winner of the Doctrine’s First Annual Post-Writing Contest is:

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Our very own Downspring#1 with 28 Doctrine Points for her great

‘Through the looking glass where a dead balloon is (really just) a dead balloon somewhere over the edge…’

CONGRATULATIONS!!!

^_^

*
**
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/Your Friend of the Doctrine & Secret Judge, Clairepeek

 

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Mid-Week Report: the Wakefield Doctrine can even tell you which is your Favorite Day of the Week!

April 4, 2012 By 1 Comment

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers )

First Annual Wakefield Doctrine Post-writing Contest Update: we expect to Post our first Contest Entries by week’s end.

(For Readers just joining us), the Contest is open to all who would write a Post with the phrase, ‘a dead balloon is a dead balloon‘ in the Title.  This Contest is open to all who want to enter, as long as you send us your info and (the link to) your Entry no later than April 13th.
The Grand Prize is a DVD of ‘Tin Man’  and will be sent to the Post that is voted by Readers ( and secretly judged by the secret judge) to be most: funny/clever/interesting/amusing and/or significantly cool.

Did you know that with the Wakefield Doctrine you can understand why the people in  your life act the way that they do?
You know what we mean, that behavior that leaves you saying to yourself, ‘Now why on earth would they feel it necessary to say a thing like that?’ or how sometimes after going out to some social affair with your boyfriend/girlfriend/wife/husband and as you drive home you keep thinking. “I really thought I knew them better than that!’

Well, those are the kinds of situations that happen to us in relationships, all the damn time. And depending on our own personalities, we either try to ignore it or get into a fight over it or even feel bad as if it were, somehow, our fault…our responsibility. If you are tired of feeling this way or want to maybe do something about not having to feel this way, then the Wakefield Doctrine can help! Do one or more of the following:

  1. Read this blog until you understand how the Wakefield Doctrine can help you
  2. Write us a Comment and demand to know how we think we can make such extravagant and un-substantiated claims
  3. Grab the person who is causing you all this grief, sit them in front of a computer open to this Post…right now if you can!
  4. “Hey! you! you are causing aggravation to a person who has come to the Wakefield Doctrine for help! Listen to us…Stop it!  Now!  (read the following step)“
  5. “Now put that other person in front of the computer you are reading this on…now! and do not try to go to another site”.
  6. OK, you are on your way to understanding the people in your life, especially the person you just made get up from the computer ( the one who is now saying, “What are they saying about me! It better not be something bad“! Ignore that and read the next two steps.
  7. The Wakefield Doctrine is a way of understanding why people act the way that they do, it is fun and it works… (“tell them you are almost done here….and that we think they are really great, but misunderstand people”)
  8. With the Wakefield Doctrine, you will not only understand the people in your lives but you will understand yourself way better than you have ever before….(“…almost done, tell them we are almost done“)
  9. There is only one thing about the Doctrine that you need to know, if you want to deal with the people in your life…
  10. the Wakefield Doctrine is for you, not for them…. ( “OK put that other person in front of the computer and write us a Comment….later, after they have left”)
  11. “Hey, you are really alright…what?  no, no they think the world of you and they totally know that you have a tough time getting the people around you to understand just how hard it can be! We know that, and believe it or not, they know that…but you gotta do us a favor… encourage them to come back to this blog and read it everyday. Will you do that for us?  Great! We knew we could count on you!!  Now put that other person back in front of this computer…oh, one more thing   the Wakefield Doctrine has hats and if you write a Comment, we might send you one! Really… now get up and give your seat back to them“.
  12. …all set!  Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine.

 

 

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the Wakefield Doctrine: keep these simple rules in mind, everything will be just fine this week…

March 19, 2012 By 8 Comments

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers )

You woke up today, the start of a brand new week.

Now, without thinking too much,  pick one of the following phrases that best describe how you feel:

A) hopeful with a touch of anxiousness

B) eager to get out into the world or work or school or homemaking… anticipation bordering on excitment

C) calm, self-assured with a sense of purpose

What your choices really mean, depending on which of the three personality types you are:

If you are a clark and you choose:

A)  hopeful with a touch of anxiousness  then you are thinking  ( …”ah…ain’t life grand! )
B)  eager to get out into the world or work or school or homemaking… anticipation bordering on excitment  then you should be thinking  ( check your homework again, make sure you did not study the wrong chapter for the test )
C)  calm, self-assured with a sense of purpose what is important is that you  ( stop doing the drugs,  alcohol and/or sleep-deprivation  stop! you cannot keep this up! )

If you are a scott and you choose:

A) hopeful with a touch of anxiousness   you might be hearing in your head: ( whats the matter, did your clarklike friend do something un-expected on you, like state that you were wrong? )
B)  eager to get out into the world or work or school or homemaking… anticipation bordering on excitment if this is how you are feeling then: ( you probably are not getting enough exercise )
C) calm, self-assured with a sense of purpose… ( lol  yeah right!…on your death bed maybe )

If you are a roger and you choose:

A) hopeful with a touch of anxiousness  don’t worry: ( your friends will not suspect that you had a dream in which you broke all the rules and laughed while doing it )
B) eager to get out into the world or work or school or homemaking… anticipation bordering on excitment  but then again: ( you know the fun herd is out there…well worth the trip through the gaunlet school bus/timecard punch line )
C) calm, self-assured with a sense of purpose…( don’t you ever get tired of being like that?! )

 

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this Wakefield Doctrine, it will help me live a more satisfying life? It offers (me) a better way to relate to people? What do I do first?

January 10, 2012 By 1 Comment

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers )

The answers to the questions posed in the Title of today’s Post (in reverse order):

  1. …read as much of this blog as you need in order to understand the Wakefield Doctrine, read the Posts and Comment on at least one of the Posts
  2. …It most certainly does!
  3. yep!
While the three, conveniently numbered answers above are all the information that the clarks in the audience will require, lets take a moment to address the needs of our rogerian and scottian Readers. In their case, we will use (a) bullet point/numbered list format, mostly because it makes the information appear to be organized in a concise and direct fashion (for our scottian readers) while, at the same time,  making everything look all neat and orderly and deliberate ( you know, rogerian!)
First up, to our scottian Readers:
  • Hey! you’re not frickin gonna believe the ‘edge’ that this Doctrine thing will give you out there in the real world
  • Thats right!! an edge…an advantage that no one…no one else but you will have at work or at play or (especially) at home
  • this is really easy!  you’re right you do have it down pretty much already  just a couple of quick pointers
  • you’re the cool action-oriented one of the three
  • the rogers, the ones you love to make fun of?  they are so easy now it’s not funny ( just joking!  still funny but better!)
  • that third type? these ‘clarks‘? you still can get them to laugh, ‘cept now with the Doctrine, they’ll get all “hey scott you really understand the Doctrine now! thats great lets talk about the theory…blah…blah…blah“
The rogerian Readers will find the Wakefield Doctrine interesting for the following, well-thought out reasons:
  1. there are numbered reasons and (they) are nicely indented
  2. obviously this Wakefield Doctrine was not developed by those scottian personality types, there is not a single crayon-drawn ‘FUCK’ anywhere to be seen (…on this page)
  3. it all seems to make sense and they do appear to be quite sincere in their appreciation of the necessity of maintaining traditions
  4. those clarks, hmmm …a little…wild-eyed and impractical, but they seem to be appreciating the necessity of maintaining traditions
  5. this all does seem to form a very neat and tidy box, too bad that I don’t recall ever having thought of it myself
  6. …wait a minute, this is all beginning to look a little bit familiar, I believe I thought of this in 1975…
Well, that should take care of all our New Readers.
Everyone else? Have fun! Seriously! (lol) after all is said and done, the Wakefield Doctrine is a fun, and useful and unique way of understanding the behavior of the people in our damn lives. If you know the characteristics of the three personality types, you are totally all set.
Boyfriend a scott? Forget the long involved appeals to his intellect:  go for the BRIGHT SHINY SEXY…when you have his attention (for however brief a time) you have all of him! As much as you are going to get, at any rate.
Wife looking like a roger? Fine, not the worst thing in the world! Need to get something done? Never surprise a roger, never present a new idea to a roger in public…always in private first get their attention” REFLECT SHINY SEXY/HOME IMPROVEMENT* If you manage to get her to believe that what you want is something that she already knew and wanted, you are all set.
clark for a friend?…how in luck are you! just don’t take their ideas and efforts at figuring our their own lives personally, there is nothing you can do to help…other than point them to this blog and hope for the best.
(Hey, do you think I should do that last section as bullet points too?…it really is some useful, practical Doctrine advice…now that I read it, it might be the whole point of today’s Post)

 

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new blogs, old friends, three personality types all in search of a Title: the Wakefield Doctrine

January 9, 2012 By Leave a Comment

Welcome to the Wakefield Doctrine ( the theory of clarks, scotts and rogers )

Hey!  Look who’s back in town*!

Mel Thompson creator of 'the Spautula in the Wilderness' and 'Mostly Teachable' wearing his Wakefield Doctrine hat (on his damn head)

I was out one day a few weeks ago,  surfing through certain areas of the internet,  I think I was  ’following-back’  a twitter or a tweet or whatever the hell you call it and I came to a blogsite with an unusual name:  Mostly Teachable.
This was a little site with a very simple layout, consisting of a Title (with comic icon) a  Post and a ‘byline’. Intrigued I read the Post and thought to myself, ‘good stuff’.  After reading the Post, I glanced at the byline by  Mel Thompson!
As Readers of the Wakefield Doctrine may recall, Mel retired ‘the Spatula’ last Spring in order to pursue other priorities (mostly involving running through the streets of “Michigan” and otherwise focusing efforts on job/career concerns).  While we all applauded Mel’s running ambitions ( in particular the 22,880 yard dash!) we all hated to see  the Spatula close down.

Well, good news to start the New Year!

We welcome Mel (and Mostly Teachable ) back to the Wakefield Doctrine blogroll. This new blog is definitely a good place to go for a relaxing read after a long day of swatting misbehaving scotts with a rolled-up newspaper or after getting out the broom to chase those annoying  rogers off the back lawn!

Speaking of this weekend’s Wakefield Doctrine Saturday Night Drive, another good one! In attendance: DS#1, DownSpring glenn and Molly ( Ms. AKH was unable to attend…something about an issue of…better just go read her latest Post).
For you new Readers, the fun about the Saturday Drive starts with the weather! Since DS#1 and Molly were calling in from widely divergent geographical locations ( from somewhere warm and from one of those big square States out West , respectively). We covered the very wide range of topics that we usually do, of note this Saturday was a telling discussion on dreams, dream interpretation and the Wakefield Doctrine. From there we went to an argument over the question of musicals as a form of entertainment (and whether or not glenn should be embarrassed by his total enthusiasm for the genre.) Finally we talked about several side projects of DS1′s and Molly’s.

In the course of the Drive, the topic of scott-clark relationships briefly rose to topic-level. So to make this a totally, well-rounded Monday Morning Post, following is a brief, talking-point-ish discussion of one of (the many) interesting aspects of the clark-scott relationship.

It is well established that clarks and scotts get along very well, the clark-scott relationship has a dynamic and an excitement level that is very satisfying to both (clark and scott). There is, however, an interesting phenomenon that often shows up (in this particular pairing) that is illustrative of both the nature of clarks and the nature of scotts.  Most of the time and for the most part, clarks tend to be a pretty passive bunch. As ‘Outsiders’, clarks look to get along with everyone, avoiding conflict and confrontation at all costs. The clark is looking to simply blend into the crowd, not stand out.  The problem with (this approach) is twofold: a) there is always conflict and 2) clarks, despite outward appearances, are really very aggressive people. It is just that clarks, for the most part, don’t see sufficient reason in day to day life to go to the trouble of being aggressive.

One of the reasons that the clark scott relationship works so well is that while scotts are naturally aggressive and will always seek to establish dominance/ranking with everyone they meet, clarks basically don’t care. They don’t care about ranking, in that clarks are comfortable being passive most of the time which works out because scotts do care (about ranking). The problem arises when the clark encounters something that rouses their aggressive side. It may be a person or an an idea or a project, but it will make a clark care and therefore become protective and possessive. The scott (in the relationship of this example) usually does not see the difference until something causes the clark to exert themselves. The clark will stop being passive and become aggressive, usually having the effect of forcing the scott to see that the ranking that they thought existed, no longer applies. This is a problem more for the scott than for the clark. Ranking is everything to the scott, and it is not sufficient to know that they are dominant over another pack member, they (the scott) must know that there is someone dominant/superior to them in the pack. While clarks can be very dominant/aggressive, they do not have an instinct to establish a ranking position in a pack structure, and so the scott is left in the position of knowing they should be aggressive but not knowing where the boundaries are, relative to their relationships.

So stop by and see Mel…be sure to say Hidy!

 

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* not literally town**

** more a place***

*** a place in the sense of a location in the blogsphere

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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